Good morning ladies-
Last night I made a decision to go for a walk. I didn't cook because I just wasn't in the right frame of mind. I needed to move. My day went by in a flash, I got home late and all I could think about was that I needed to go outside and be with God.
The day started with finding out that one of my classmates died of cancer. I realized that his brother had been one of my best clients. A couple of weeks ago I asked him how his brother was doing. The answer, "Only God knows." Michael had injured himself while helping the Moore Oklahoma families and had to have surgery. During his downtime, he and his brother spent many hours together. He told me that although the injury wasn't convenient, the time with his brother was priceless. And today, I'm sure he has no regrets.
It's funny because you never know what God is going to do and how he will do it. Michael's brother went from being away from God to being one with God. Even my classmates are posting a video of what God was doing in His life. Many will watch and I pray that with each word they hear the mighty power of Christ. I'm sure if he had a choice, he would have chosen to live. His kids are young and yet, God had a very different plan.
Is his life a tragedy or a testimony? I guess we could answer both ways but I would rather say it's a testimony to a faith that surpasses all understanding. I know what it's like to wander in the desert and I know what it's like to surrender and when we surrender, no matter the circumstances, there's a peace we just can't explain.
So as I walked yesterday, I thought of all these things. I pictured Ken dancing on the streets of gold, meeting others that had gone before him. I pictured God in all His glory saying, "Job well done." I pictured joy instead of sadness. As I walked, I repented of my sins, thinking on all the times I questioned Him and His divine path. I asked God to show me the way and let me see Him. I looked up at the sky and asked Him to reveal Himself through His power and wisdom. And then I asked Him to make me His woman.
You may have heard me use the term "His woman" many times on this blog. It has a great meaning. I have lived for the world and I have lived for Jesus and on any given day, I would rather live for Him than myself. I have troubles and tribulations just like the rest of you but if I'm going to be refined and since that's the case then I want it to be for Him and not for my sins. It's one thing to go through a hard time coming out of it knowing Jesus more and then there's the times we do something, have consequences and then have to find Christ through our shame and sorrow. I would rather ask Him to make me His woman, help me walk a straight path and be led to Him. He already knows my faults but I guarantee He has forgiven me long before I can forgive myself.
Last night, I was on the path of asking and listening to Pandora and all the wonderful Christian music they play. I heard Mercy Me and a song on the "Hurt and Healing" album. I think what struck me the hardest is when I heard them sing about Goliath. I have so many Goliath's in my life. I don't want to be the strongest man, the bravest warrior, or the toughest, nastiest individual. I want to be David, holding a sling and fearing no man. His strength came from his belief in God and that no man could stand between him and his God. That's who I want to be!
I have a long way to go before I could be characterized like David but it's my hearts desire to know Him and be that close to Him. David's life is a picture for all to see. How many times did he look up at the sky and proclaim that God was good? Just think about that for a minute. Your hiding in caves like an animal and yet, you wake up early, walk out of your cold, dark home to see the sun rising. How do you think you would feel? Well, you probably know how that feels if you've been released of a heavy burden. That's how I felt last night. I felt like God had released a burden off my heart. I surrendered to Him all that is His and asked for Him to guide me through the pool of my thoughts, feelings and choices. The world can read these words and yet, I don't care anymore because I know and truly believe that God will use them for His glory. I'm not a movie star or a great athlete; I'm just an ordinary woman looking for a mighty God. He is near and He is waiting for you to surrender to Him!
Take a walk today and see the glory in His works. His works and His words are mighty. If you aren't looking up a Scripture a day then you are missing out. I have my times when life gets tough and I'm not on this blog as much as I want to be but then I'm reminded that the sacrifice of getting up at 5:15 is my time to be with Him and you. As I've said many times before, I don't know you but I can feel your prayers. Turn your hearts toward God, pray for the women and men all over the world and pray that God will show His mighty hand as you pursue Him. He's waiting, hear His call.
May God bless you and keep you all your days and thank you for reading this blog and hearing the truth about our Lord Jesus Christ and one woman's heart to pursue Him.
Hebrews 11:40 NIV
since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.
Psalm 66:10 NIV
For you, God, tested us; you refined us like silver.
Romans 8:31 NIV
What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?
My prayer today:
O, Lord, as I came before You last night I just want to Thank You for Your hand on my life. As I walked and meditated on Your words, the day came off my shoulders and I knew You were carrying my burden. My strength is not my own and yet my heart is all Yours. I know that I am a sinner that needs a Savior. I realize that my past sometimes haunts me and the things I view as mistakes You have taken and refined me. The fire has been hot at times and the road long but with all of that, I know You're near. I count the birds and hear the crickets and ponder Your greatness. The frog croaks as the sun sets and I know Your hand is on this earth. There are children needing food, people needing shelter and places that are at war that need peace. I realize that my problems are miniscule to those around me and I know that I can't heal nations, change people or be everything everyone needs to be happy. My purpose is not to do any of those things. You have given me a commission to use the talents You have given and spread the word of a beautiful, forgiving, merciful God. I pray that with every word I write that it's true and real. I pray that my portrayal of You is accurate with no false prophecies and that I am as honest as possible. I pray that women would read these words and know that I am Your woman and everything that comes from me is not mine but Yours. You are my powerful Savior, full of love for man. I am but a mere woman, wandering on this earth, hearing Your call and asking You to raise Your army so that others will hear Your name. You are mighty, You are merciful and You are my God. There is no other like You and I'm so grateful You took the time to pursue me, love me and save me. I am Yours. Please protect me as I walk toward You and protect my sisters as they hear Your call. We are one through You, by You and with You. Be with us today as we live our lives for You. In Jesus name, AMEN