Monday, October 28, 2013

October 28, 2013

Good afternoon all-

I have an important question to ask, do you follow Christ because you love him or do you follow Him because you fear Him?  I know that these questions are packed with a punch but I think it's important for us to look at our reasoning for following Him.  Do we really know Him like we should?  Is it more important for us to look good rather than build a relationship with Him?  Do we seek Him because our heart wants to know Him deeper or are we floating along hoping to catch a glimpse of Him?  We probably do some or all but in the end we should examine our intent.

When I first found Christ my intent was to know Him because He saved me.  As I grew in my walk, I became more judgmental and full of the law.  I walked and talked like I knew more than anyone else.  As a matter of fact, I came home for break and tried to save my entire family from Hell.  I was an evangelist in my own mind.  In some ways, I even became a walking, talking Pharisee.

I read my Bible, quit reading anything that was not biblical and stopped everything else.  My life went from being that of a teenager to a full blown adult, with not a lot of grey area.  I only looked at things black and white and the more I looked that way the better I felt about my actions and those that I surrounded myself with.  I judged.  It's really unfortunate when I look back because maybe some would have followed Christ if I hadn't been such a stickler on my way being the only way.

Now there are some things that are black and white.  How we get saved, who Jesus is and what God did for the sinner, there is no moving that ground.  However, what about grace, mercy and love?  For those first months I forgot about the latter and only worked on those things I believed were true.  I became the driving force behind the next revival at least in my own mind.  I'm sure you can imagine what happened.  Not a lot of anything.  People quit talking to me and I quit even liking who I had become.  I always loved the underdog and worked hard at loving people.  That changed when I began to believe I was better than everyone else.  Looking back I'm so ashamed but with that, I also found what it meant to be a daughter of Christ.  Maybe I had to go through my period of throwing the first stone to see the stone that was wedged in my eye.

I have many faults and through the years I have been tested, refined and continue to be worked on.  I try not to judge because I don't know what tomorrow will bring and I have learned that by loving people I can show Christ so much better than casting that first stone.  We are to love the sinner and hate the sin.  Somewhere along the way, I had forgotten that I was a sinner and that only by His grace did I get saved.  Humbling and very true.

The workers are few.  We can see that for ourselves.  Persecution can happen and bad things do happen to good people but the message of the cross exists and is real.  It can stand on its own or we can be used to help spread it.  His goal for us is not to be pious.  He would rather have us be His friend, learn about who He is and what matters to Him than be educated fools.  I know there are a lot of those kinds of people that are out there.  They are the ones that believe that brilliance equals knowing more than the next person.  I believe that by investing in Jesus we will know more than the most intelligent scholar.  Why?  Because you only know what He wants you to know anyway so why not be humble and spread His word the right way:  by loving Him, knowing Him and proclaiming Him.

If you find yourself tired of serving Him, maybe you should look at your motives.  God gives you the energy you need to do His will.  You may be doing your will over His.  Think about that for a moment, can we as Christians do something for ourselves rather than Him?  Absolutely!  It's all in the motive behind the service.  Today, I go to church, talk to people and spread the word through this blog not because I'm looking for esteem.  I'm really just wanting everyone to know how Jesus has impacted my life.  He is my friend, my husband and my love.  He is all things to me.  Me knowing what He represents is a bonus.  My goal for my life is to show love, mercy and kindness because when I least deserved it, He gave it to me anyway.

I hope today finds you will.  I have to go back to work but I hope you think about your motives and your relationship with Him.  He knows you, don't you want to know Him?

Acts 15:9 NIV
     He did not discriminate between us and them, for he purified their hearts by faith.

Colossians 2:6-7 NIV

     So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.

I have to go back to work so I will leave the prayer to you.  I think you will know what needs to be said.  Have a wonderful and beautiful day and in all things thank Jesus from delivering you from sin.

Until tomorrow...

Thursday, October 24, 2013

October 23,2013

Good morning all-

This week has been so busy that I haven't had much time to write but I've had a ton on my mind.  I woke up this morning with one thought, "Defeat is not an option.!"  This statement should be our motto.  If we are going to head into battle then we need to at least prepare our minds and have an end goal.  My end goal it to continue fighting and not let defeat be my escape route.

We have the ability to be defeated.  We have the spirit to let go.  We have choice.  What are you going to choose?  It's easier to be defeated than to fight the war.  Just look at society today.  We are letting misconceptions, lies and selfishness overtake what used to be about unity, kindness and perseverance.  We would rather start a war over money and power then take care of our own.  It's really sad.  I know that I can't win every battle being waged today.  I just don't have the power. However, I can do what I've been asked by my king and pray for the women all over the world.  I can light a fire under us to do  more than be apathetic and to stand up for what we know is true.  I can infuse Scripture into our daily lives and offer up prayers for those that can't pray.  Just like you, I can get down.  I'm not some mighty warrior that never sees a tear.  As a matter of fact, up until a few years ago, I couldn't even cry.  I held all my emotions in believing that my strength came from me alone.  Foolish, I know, but nevertheless that's how I lived my life.

Today, I know I can't do it alone.  My faith has grown through many battles and when I get the thought in my head it's time to retreat, I have to go to Jesus.  For Him, defeat was not an option.  As a man, He chose us over His own life.  I would imagine that wasn't an easy decision.  But in the end, He was nailed to a cross for us!  I am humbled by that in so many ways I can't even tell you but I also know that I am human and sometimes when life gets tough I want to retreat.

I'm not sure why I feel so strongly about this today.  Maybe it's because I know that to stay in the fight is worth more than my own life.  To live for Jesus is worth it and that even though I will face many trials and many more battles trusting in Him is where I need to stand.  Now, I won't be able to do this if I stand by my feelings.  I will only be able to stay the course if I am likeminded with Him, following and seeking His will, His wisdom and His hand.  Warriors need tools and my tools come from Him.  Prayer is the most powerful tool we have along with Scripture.  Jesus prayed and taught prayer to the disciples.  Obviously, it worked for them.  Millions were saved and the church still stands after thousands of years of persecution.  We might not be dying in the US because of our faith but look at the news, there are people in Syria and Egypt that are.  We can't close our eyes, tuck our tails and run for the hills.  We must stand on sacred ground and put Jesus at the helm.  I have read of great generals and men that saved their troops, made wise decisions and won wars.  Do you really think they did it alone?  No.  Men and women were praying, they were seeking and in battle they found the one true God.  There's only one way to win any battle and that's through the power of the cross.

If you find yourself struggling with what matters and believing you should retreat, stand your ground.  Always seek Jesus and remember that trusting in Him is the only way to win the war.  We are His women laying the foundation of faith for the next generation.  If we don't believe in Him, who will.  Our fight has been going on since the day of Eve and it will continue until Jesus comes back to take His bride.  In the meantime, we must unite, take up the cross and pray from the US all over the world.  Each voice is heard and together our voices become one.  Be strong my sisters and take up the cross because defeat is not an option!

I pray that you are getting stronger, wiser and more encouraged.  I pray that God has His hand on you today and that you are seeking Him with your entire being.  He is near, we just need to make the call! Be well and as always you have a friend in me.

Joshua 14:11 NIV

     I am still as strong today as the day Moses sent me out; I'm just as vigorous to go out to battle now as I was then.

2 Chronicles 13:12 NIV

     God is with us; he is our leader.  His priests with their trumpets will sound the battle cry against you.  People of Israel, do not fight against the Lord, the God of your ancestors, for you will not succeed.

My prayer today:

O, Lord come upon your might warriors and send a message of encouragement and hope.  Help those that are weak be strong in You.  Bring about a revival to every woman, in every nation.  Give us time to be with You and to encourage others to put their trust in the only living God.  Nations may crumble and people may die but You will always stand.  Defeat was not an option for You.  Please give us the courage to stand up and speak Your mighty name.  Let us be bold in our thoughts and in our actions and although we are not here to save your chosen, we are here to spread Your word.  I rely on You to lead me through the good times and the bad times.  I have learned most through hardship and found You in the middle.  The battle is greater than one woman so I'm calling upon You to raise up mighty warriors that will spread the news and that will learn to trust in You no matter the circumstances.  Be with us today as we carry the cross the masses.  Almighty God You are our portion, speak to us and give us encouragement to continue down the path that leads to You!  In Jesus name, AMEN

Until tomorrow...

Saturday, October 19, 2013

October 19, 2013

Good morning all-

I have a lot on my mind today so I finished one blog to start another.  Hopefully, it's worth your time to read both or like me, you will come back and read it later.  I have a little more time on my hands this morning and I woke up with this on my heart so I thought if I could finish the blog I started yesterday and then sit and write this one, God would multiply the rest of my day.

Yesterday, I took the day off and spent it cleaning areas of my house I hate to clean, like closets.  I hate to clean and yet that's all I do.  I have to pick up, clean dishes, do the laundry and then it starts all over again.  I don't know why I spend so much time complaining about it in my head but I do.  That's a problem in itself but on with the story.

 I went in search of a new vacuum cleaner and one store didn't have it, so I decided to go out and search for it.  During that time, I had a really good friend on my mind and noticed she liked the blog on Facebook so I decided to call her.  She is such a wonderful person.  If you met her on the street you would notice her because she has a big smile and always shines like the sun.  She is not only beautiful outside but radiates beauty on the inside.  For the last three years she has struggled in her marriage and now, her daughter is four, she's wore out, fallen out of love and moving towards a divorce and all I could think of is,"there goes another one down."  What do I mean by that?  I mean a family, broken, hurt and sad.  Why? Because one person couldn't stop drinking, yelling or being critical and the other lost faith in Him.  The scars are not visible to the outside world.  No one would know that her marriage is failing or that she has endured endless hours and years of verbal abuse, all they would see is her smile.  Funny how we can keep our darkest secrets and let the world only see what we want them to see.

I know what it's like to go out and put a smile on your face when your marriage is crumbling.  I know what it's like to try to make a man happy only to feel like you somehow are destroying him with every look and every word.  It's crazy.  The man that was your hero brought down by you.  After a while you begin to think so and then you get angry and lastly you're done.  People try counseling but it's just too late.  They have done the circle of abuse for too long only to find out to late that all you really wanted was that person from the beginning.

A marriage and the vows that come with it are not to be taken lightly.  It is a commitment on both parties part to honor and treasure one another.  Often, Satan turns those words into malice, hate, and abandonment. Drinking, drugs, anger and abuse come from what once was passion.  A man marries a woman because they fall in love.  They really love the fact that you respect them and hold them up.  They feel like they could do no wrong in your sight until one day their actions change that and the destruction begins.  In the Bible, God does not talk about a man's love like He does for a woman.  He talks about respect.  If you think about it that's how it all begins.  My mom always said that mutual respect was the key to having a good marriage and since my parents had a great one, I know she's right.  The Bible talks about respecting our husbands but it's hard to respect someone that doesn't even respect themselves.  That's where I think our men need help.

I'm petitioning all of you to begin a campaign of respect.  I would like us all to do two things: pray for our men to have courage and for women to respect men.  These two things will be vital in our fight against the devil.  He is destroying marriage as I write.  I have also felt His hand in my marriage.  He seeks to destroy that which God intended.  Many wonder why secular couples stay married longer than Christian couples.  I don't.  I know that if he can destroy what God has put together; He destroys generations.

Whether you believe that divorce is good or bad doesn't matter. There are times where divorce is the only way to save oneself.  The world is getting uglier day by day and women are at the heart of this destruction.  We see women being used as human bombs.  Children walking the streets to be put as targets to soldiers and soldiers coming home wanting to destroy themselves for the things they had to do.  We are in a world where wars are common and death and destruction are inevitable but there is hope.   The same hope we place our hearts in is with us now.  He watches over us and intercedes but we are at the core of the fight, so ladies let's fight.  I'm tired of hearing of marriages falling apart and that includes mine.  I'm fighting against something I can't see and yet I know it's right in front of me.  I can feel the attacks before they even begin and when they get strong, my defenses weaken and all kinds of things creep in.  We can't continue hoping things will get better for our men or ourselves.  We must pray for the covenant that men and women are taking.  We must pray that our men will not get discouraged and will wage a war against the flesh and evil.  We must stand up for our families and ask Christ to do a miracle.  Not every marriage will be saved, I know that but I think we have a better chance if we are praying for them.  In addition, we must pray for our hearts.  When we go to battle, it's easy for the enemy to destroy us first.  We are geared more towards love and feelings so it's easier to tear us down and once we are bare, there's nothing left.

I know this is a long blog today but I had to get this out.  Jesus is the answer.  All the words in the world don't add up to our Mighty Savior.  He can heal the hurt, change a heart and mend a broken marriage.  He can provide courage where only cowardice reigns and He can take what Satan would destroy and lift it up.  I know because He's done it countless times in my life.  I have felt His hand in my darkest hours and I have heard Him say in my head, be obedient, I am here.  Do you know how hard is it do that when every drop of feeling is gone?  Well, I have countless times and He has renewed, restored, and brought me to a place of great faith.  This fight is bigger than one woman. It's going to take men and women fighting against an enemy they can't see and trusting in the blood of Jesus.  We are one and we must pray as one to fight for our families, for our children and for the next generation.  Many marriages succeed, why?  Because at the heart of each marriage there was a friendship, a sacrifice and a true commitment to die to oneself.  Christ was in the middle and the woman was treasured and the man respected.  My favorite thing about going out is to see the couples walking around that are in their 70s, 80s and 90s, holding hands, eating dinner together or just being.  They make my heart glad.  That's how my parents would have been.  At my dad's funeral, I held up their two wedding bands that I had strung together with a purple ribbon.  They now sit in a safe deposit box but they are my guide to what marriage is.  For all the marriages that are broken, there are those that lasted a lifetime.  I can only walk today and fight the battle one day at a time but that keepsake reminds me that God is present and that marriage is worth fighting for.

For those of you that are reading this blog that have been divorced, please know I understand and sometimes people make choices that leave you with only one option.  God is merciful and understands.  I pray for you that you will continue to seek Him and if He sends someone in your direction to love and care for you that you take it.

I hope today finds you well and that you find hope for yourself in these words.  God is right here.  He's fighting along side us but we must fight too.  We have to fight our minds, our flesh and our enemy and the only way we can do that is to give our hearts and minds to Christ.

Ezra 10:4 NIV

     Rise up; this matter is in your hands.  We will support you, so take courage and do it."

Phillipians 1:20 NIV

     I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death.

Ephesians 5:33 NIV

     However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

My prayer today:

O, Lord, I come to you today with a whole lot on my mind.  I feel like I have spit up all over this page and I ask that You would make known what's on Your heart.  I would ask that You would unite women all over the world to pray for marriage whether they are today or not.  I would ask that You would help us be the women that respect men and that we would continue to lift them up.  I believe that men are being attacked and that families are suffering.  You are the only one that can fix the messes we place into our hearts and minds.  Give us all courage to stay the course, to love You and to put You in the middle of all of our relationships. I am not discouraged because I know that You are fighting right beside me for the good of the family and You will continue to until we meet face to face.  We are Your children and You love us with all our flaws.  Be with us today as we unite for the good of marriage.  Lift up our children and their children and help us all make wise decisions.  Give us strength to die to ourselves and replace it with the things that matter to YOU!  We are Your children and so I'm asking for protection, for one mind and for You to give us the knowledge and understanding to win this great war!  May we seek You daily, love You more and be faithful to Your cause.  You are the light and all we need today.  Thank You for being everything we aren't.  In Jesus Name, AMEN

Until tomorrow....

October 17,2013

Hello my sisters!

I can't believe how much the flesh determines our direction.  I watched an employee fall apart and really not tell the truth today.  I thought that I would get mad but all I did was feel sorry for her.  Later in the day I found out my other single mom fell apart because she went from being a stay at home mom to a working mom, all due to a husband that followed his flesh over the commitment he made.

It was a crazy day and all I could think about is how the flesh controls us and how often we fall into that downward spiral of flesh over spirit. At what point do we surrender and realize living for Jesus is the only way?  I don't have a global answer for that because each one of us walk with Him individually.  What I think I know is that we walk more in the spirit when our heart is open and repentant. It's hard to walk that way.  Humans love to protect themselves and often think they are right when we are wrong.  It;s called pride and every human suffers from it.  I don't care if you live in the US or Russia, we suffer from selfishness, pride and temptation.  It's all part of the fall.  However, Jesus came to give us freedom from those very things.  He came humbled among man and walked this earth with nothing more than the robes on His back.  He didn't ask for people to acclaim Him, He was who He was and He knew His role.  I thank God every day for sending His Son, sacrificing Him on a cross and giving me His holy spirit.  Without it, I would be an absolute mess, well I'm a mess anyway, but at least I surrender to Him.  If I have to surrender myself, my pride and my soul, who better to surrender it too.

Like you, I have all the human elements that make us wretched.  I get angry, I'm often stubborn, and I want people to admire me.  None of those things matter to Jesus.  There's only one thing He ever wanted and that's our love.  I'm humbled by a God that only cares about my heart.  He didn't care if I was beautiful, if I had great talents or if the masses loved me.  He only cares that I know Him, that my heart seeks Him and that I surrender all.  As I write this my words seem simple but they just aren't.  We live in a time where everyone can know everything about us.  The web is wide and people are hacking accounts, stealing identities, and delving into personal information.  There are no secrets anymore.  You may have them but eventually someone will find out.  The one thing that no one can steal from you is your heart.  It belongs to One God!  Our hearts are all He treasures and yet, what do we treasure?  Do we look at our homes, our bank accounts and our families and store our treasures there?  More than likely, we do.  Why?  Because we are human and the flesh takes over.  Our fleshly selves love to amass things.  The more friends, the more money and the more riches we have the more powerful we feel.  Jesus is the exact opposite.  All He wanted was for us to seek Him with all our hearts and He would turn over the keys to a kingdom.

It's something for us to think about.  I suffer from the flesh as much as anyone.  You have read it in my words.  My struggles are just like most of the people around the world but the one thing that I found long ago was Jesus.  I hid Him behind my walls and my mind until one day, I made a decision to open my heart to the world and write this blog.  He has my heart, my failings and my love.  I would be nothing without Him!

If you're struggling trying to find the meaning in life and you find your searching the world for your gratification, I beg you to stop, get on your knees and commit your heart once again to Jesus.  You may never have great riches or walk where the ancients did.  You may never travel around the world or meet famous people and you may never know the comfort of having a bank account that's overflowing, but you do have Jesus and He promises to meet us where we are.  Our hearts belong to a Savior that understands the flesh.  He conquered it to hang on a cross.  His love was greater than all the gold coin in the land, then and now.

We belong to Him and the only ransom He asks for is the only thing you can give.  So take today and give Him your heart, He's waiting.  I think that's the best gift of all, that He waits patiently until we die to our flesh and find Him, what a wonderful Savior!

I pray today for those of you that read this blog and those of you that will be led to it.  This is all His  I'm a fleshly vessel sitting at a computer writing the words that come to mind but behind every word is my God, the one I cry to in the night and the one that beckons me and makes me better than I was yesterday.  I won't be perfect until I'm at His feet.  The most I can hope for is that I continue to be true to myself and follow along the path He has given me.  I love you my sisters and I hope you can give the one thing He's asking for today.  It's yours to give!

Romans 8:5 NIV

      Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; bu those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.

Psalm 26:73 NIV

      My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

My prayer:

O,  Lord, the day is still not yet upon us and I all I can think about is how fleshly I truly am. My mind goes to all the things that need to be completed before my day even begins.  I'm pulled in twenty different directions but when I sit here and write my thoughts, the only one I can think of is You.  Your sacrifice is my reward.  How many times have I written that?  I can't even count but when I put it with  my flesh and see Your sacrifice I am in awe.  Thank You for waiting for me to give my heart freely and for loving me enough to be patient, watching over me until I gave it all.  I am constantly trying to see You and yet sometimes, my life, my struggles take hold and all I can do is think about myself.  It's those times that I lose sight of You and I become discouraged, critical and stop trusting in what I know is right.  You never leave me and You haven't left the others either.  Give them courage to find You, to love You and to give of their hearts freely.  Take the blinders of selfishness off and fill each person with a peace beyond understanding.  Your blood has given us freedom, no other god talked about on earth gave their life for someone else, only You.  That's why You are the One true God, the Only God and the Only way to Heaven!  Please write this on peoples hearts and help me pray for the souls that are lost and lonely.  Keep me real and help me surrender all.  I'm trying with all my might but my trying won't do anything.  Giving of my heart is all You require, so today, I once again die to my flesh and surrender my heart.  You are worth it!  In Jesus name,  AMEN

Until tomorrow....

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

October 16, 2013

Good morning all-

I probably should have said good afternoon since that's when I'm finding time to write.  I don't know about you but whenever I get to write is a good time.  With everything that has been going on, I have really been thinking about Christ and what a servant He was to all of us.  It's not just what God did to create everything, it's what He gave to us so that we could find Him. 

How many of you would trade your child, brother or loved one so that others could have grace?  Probably not one person and that would just be honest.  We don't like to give up anything for others.  Look at how many people volunteer or give resources to furthering others lives.  The workers are few.  And yet, God saw fit to sacrifice His only begotten Son for people that would choose themselves over others?  Crazy! And yet, our Father did just that. Our fortune came from a loving God, not because we deserved it but because He willed it.

I don't know about you but I'm humbled by His sacrifice and anytime I get it in my head to be prideful, angry or hurt; I go back to that.  Like you, I am so human.  These things creep into my heart and stall my progress at knowing Him.  Thank goodness I don't let them stay for very long.  It's like cleaning house, once my heart gets full of garbage I purge it and move toward letting God purify it.  I'll forever be a work in progress but at least I'm His.

Don't let the baggage of this world cloud the gift that was given. It was given freely and sacrificially.  We aren't killing lambs just to have grace anymore.  Why?  Because a man gave His life for us and has continued to intervene for us for more years than we know.

I can't tell you how many times I have asked God to take my cup from me, only for it to be handed back to me.  I can grumble about it but in the same breath I know that every time the cup was handed back, I died to myself and looked for Him more.  Without my cup, I might be an angry, bitter, judgmental person.  Luckily, because I have a cup there's no where for me to go but on my knees and if that's where I must be, so be it.

I read a letter last night from a soldier to his mother.  My husband's uncle earned over 20 metals in two wars.  He knew MacArthur personally and was awarded some of the highest medals by the President but in his letter he never mentioned any of that.  He did state, "I am awake watching over my soldiers and throughout that time I pray.  There is no better time to pray and I get 5 hours in every night I keep watch. What most people don't know is that you can physically feel Jesus in battle and when you are facing your enemy.  He is near and I grow closer to him as I near the next great battle."

Those words haunted me last night. A young man writing home spoke of his faith, his fear and his closeness while in battle.  He wasn't full of pride for being a great war hero; He was a man seeking a Savior.  He put into words what few of us could because in his darkest hour he never depended on himself; He just depended on Jesus.  How many times have we gone into battle with only ourselves to hold onto?  I think that's why we are all in the mess we're in today.  People believe they know what is best and only seek God when everything is a mess.  God should be sought whether things are beautiful or things are catastrophic.  He gave each of us a cup, just as He did with His Son and it's time we take the cup and ask Him what He wants from us.

We won't be remembered for the job we did or the times we cried.  Our accolades on earth mean nothing but the lives we lead, the choices we make and our love for Jesus will stand the test of time.  On our death beds we won't ask Jesus if He is proud for what we amassed, we will ask Him if we did a good job and can we finally come home.  These are the things we need to be thinking about and die to our desires.  I know that reading that letter made me think of all I hold dear and honestly, the only thing I should hold dear is Jesus!

Take today and search your heart.  See if Jesus comes first.  If He doesn't it's time to change course and put Him behind the wheel.  There is no safer driver than our Savior!  May God bless you today as you seek Him and may He continue to give me words to write to you.

Psalm 55: 18 NIV

      He rescues me unharmed from the battle waged against me, even though many oppose me.

James 4:1 NIV

     What causes fights and quarrels among you?  Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?

Pray that God takes the battle out of you and places grace, love and mercy in its wake!

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

October 14, 2013

Good morning all-

I thought I would start off by saying how grateful I am to be writing again.  My thoughts have been coming in and out and then back again.  I found myself walking for two hours, contemplating life and asking why?  Why me, why now and what do I have to offer anyway?  That's when a red squirrel ran across the street, went half way up a tree, to come back down and run again. 

I thought it would stop with the squirrel but then a huge grasshopper jumped toward the weeds, a butterfly flew by and a red tailed hawk flew low waiting to get his next meal.  All of this added up to one thing for me, Jesus.  How do you walk when you want to run?  What if you run and no one cares?  Finally, does anyone care?  Jesus always cares and He just wouldn't let me forget that.

If God created the world and all the little creatures, isn't He able to change a heart, a man or me?  Of course He can.  I know that and believe it but every once in a while I falter and fall down.  God commands me to love, not myself but others.  He asks me to stand when all I want to do is fall down.  He gave me His word to help me walk when I want to run and He loves me through all my baggage.  Wow!  All that in a span of an hour.  Can I learn fast?  Not really.  He continues to refine my thoughts and my actions because at the end of the day, I'm hard headed so normally, I have to hit the wall at least five times before it gets into my thick skull.  Know anyone like that?

Well, I'm determined to learn this lesson and to be more patient with God than myself.  I realize that I am human and that when things get tough, running seems a good idea.  I can't run away from life, no matter how I try and then again, why would I?  This is His life, His glory and I'm just a vessel.  If my vessel must be refined through the fire then so be it because at the end of this life, I want to be in His arms, praising Him and thanking Him for what He did in my life.

I wish I could say that every day is easy for me and that my garden is always flourishing. To be truthful I don't think I would even want to live like that.  Although the fire is hot sometimes and I often feel uncomfortable, just knowing He is with me is enough.  Just like the fires that take acres away, the soil gets replenished and eventually new growth begins and grows in abundance, that's my life.  It's not always easy and the path isn't always clear but I know that with each fire I am growing and becoming more like Him.  So, even when I don't think it's worth it, it really is.

I hope today finds you well my sisters and I pray that God is revealing Himself to you in someway that matters to you.  His creation always says a lot to me and therefore, I am abiding in Him, trusting that He can make my life glorify Him and with every step I take, I'm walking more in Him than me.  Please pray for the nations and especially the US.  We are in great need of a Savior right now so please pray that the leaders would see Christ and shed the selfishness of this life for eternal grace.

Be well and thank you for your prayers.  They're working because I'm writing again.

Romans 8:28 NIV

     And we know that in all things God works for the good of those that love Him, who have been called according to his purpose.

I'll leave the prayer to you! 

Monday, October 14, 2013

October 13, 2013

Good morning all-

I'm sorry I haven't written in a week.  I have felt less creative, more sluggard, and really tired.  I actually slept in for the first time in years.  I guess my body is needing some rest.  That being said, I have felt guilty for not getting on here.  I know that this time with the Lord is precious and even when I don't feel like writing; I need too.  Like everything else in life, sometimes my emotions get to me and I wonder why do I do this anyway?

I'm sure you have had similar experiences.  Maybe you serve your church, your friends or your family constantly and every once in a while wish someone would serve you.  I think it's normal but it gets in the way with what God is asking us to do in our daily lives.  We are to serve and yet, when human emotions come into play, the only one we want to serve is ourselves.

I'm not a person that is run on emotion.  As a matter of fact, I often have to run on common sense instead of how I feel but every once in a while I find myself throwing a huge pity party for myself, which means I just want to sit and be left alone.  You know the feeling.  We see it in two year olds when they don't get their way.  The only difference is I can't lay on the floor kicking and screaming.  Well, I guess I could but who would come and get me.

Our pastor has been taking us through the book of Acts and I thoroughly have enjoyed going chapter by chapter.  The question yesterday is why James died and Peter lived?  It's really a good question.  I mean eventually Peter will die but in that moment, one died and another was freed.  Why one and not the other?  We will never know but the one thing we do know is that whether we live or die, our lives are set for the glory of God and it's His will that reigns over our lives.

I take comfort in that today.  I know that I have been like a shock of wheat, blowing in the wind.  I know that my mind is on everything not of Jesus and I know that when my fingers don't dance on the keyboard it's because I've let life take over service.  I wouldn't go as far to say that I've been acting like two but I have been in my own mind doing my own will.  OOPS!  I'm repenting today and asking the Lord of light to shine on me once again.  I'm just like you full of daily trials and sometimes those trials get me down.  I'm back up thanks to my Savior and I hope you are too.  Don't leave me faithful readers but do pray for me.  Just like you, I'm human and fallible.  I have feelings and emotions that sometimes carry me far from the living water.

May God take care of you today and wash you with His Holy Spirit.  I saw this Scripture yesterday and I had to laugh because I end up confessing my sins to the public when I write this blog.  I'm just grateful for the grace.

John 7:4 NIV

     No one who wants to become a public figure acts in secret.  Since you are doing these things, show yourself to the world."

I think I just did!  Have a blessed day!

Sunday, October 6, 2013

October 6, 2013

Good morning all-

I was reminded yesterday that God can do miracles, change hearts and win souls.  I know this already but as I read the paper, watched the news or looked at world events sometimes my views get clouded. Every day someone is murdered, someone seeks revenge or they drown in sorrow looking for an escape.

This is what is real. There are no questions to the turmoil around the world but there is a God who knows all and it's within us to hear His call.  What does it mean to follow Christ? Is it a sacrifice, or dangerous? Not in America. There are places in the world that leading a life for Christ can and will get you killed. It's odd that over 2000 years later blood is being shed over Jesus.  Yet, it is.

I think about my life a lot and although I have struggled personally; I have never feared for my life.  After Columbine, I remembered wondering could I have faced a gunman and proclaimed Jesus?  The girl that did was stronger than most and although she lost her life she gained far more.  She was one of the few who died knowing who she believed in and why. She was probably only 17 years old and still today I remember how I admired her courage and her faith.

We walk around in selfishness.  I do too.  You know the way we belly ache about life.  Why can't my circumstances be different, why do they have more, and why can't I?  Silly when you think about it really.  As much as I wish some things were different, our lives are His to orchestrate. I want to be a woman that walks and has faith. I want to stop looking at the world with dark glasses and begin to look at events through the light of Jesus. Bad things happen everywhere and yet, babies are being born, teenagers are living for Christ and souls are being won.

We are not in control and the sooner we realize it, the better we will be.  I asked a question and hoped people would respond, no one did so my hope is you thought about it.  Faith comes when you believe that God is who He says He is!  Looking at circumstances will make us doubt, I know I do it all the time.  Our pastor always says, "Don't walk by feelings, walk by faith."

Eve ate an apple because she believed that it wouldn't hurt her and yet, years later we still have pain in child birth, we desire our men to understand us better and now, women are taking control where men used to lead.  We are confused in our roles and in who we are.  What seemed a simple act destroyed the garden, made man toil and left women doubting who they are.

Thanks to Jesus, I'm starting to know who I am in Him.  I've quit being frightened of ridicule and have forged on my life's path.  If you had asked me years ago if I would pour my heart out to strangers, it would have been absolutely, no.  Yet, here I am writing on a blog to strangers talking about the most controversial topic in the world and praying God will use me to win souls for Him.

We are His.  Our lives belong to our Savior. It's time we begin to pray for change!  Silence, being skeptical and fear, hold us back from knowing Him more.  We can hide for a time but we were born for a purpose. If your struggling with issues of doubt, fear or sadness, reach out, be bold and get prayer.  This world is filled with women that are living for Jesus, take the plunge, it's worth it!

As I sit in my living room the sun is coming up and a new day is dawning, carpe diem my sisters!

     I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen. (1 Timothy 1:12-17 NIV)

Thursday, October 3, 2013

October1, 2013

Good morning all-

The question for today is who can be faithful?

October 3, 2013

Good morning-

I am in beautiful California and have been awake for at least two hours.  My body thought it was 6 am instead of 4 am, oh well.  The nice thing is that I've been able to do a ton of work, talk to co-workers, set appointments and prepare for my meeting today.  In addition, I got to sit and write for a few minutes.

Yesterday, I got totally lost.  GPS got confused at the San Francisco Airport and routed me to Redwood instead of Dublin, I went 45 minutes out of my way, luckily I realized something was really wrong.  You know when you have that feeling that you aren't going where you're supposed too.  That was me yesterday and luckily, I figured it out before I really got lost.  Thank goodness for GPS, even when it gets confused.

I will be working today and enjoying a little of what California has to offer.  We are going to see some of the sights.  I  love California, too bad it costs so much.  It was fun to fly over the Ocean and to see mountains everywhere.  I love to see the beauty but within it is traffic, lots of people and the possibility of wildfires, which I saw yesterday near the side of the highway.  So much beauty!  It makes me think of the greatness of God's creation and how I'm just a little ant in a big world.

Being this far away from home always makes me anxious.  It's times like this that I hope nothing goes wrong, that everyone is safe and that my trip is worth being miles away from my family.  Being with people is what sells products but being away from your family gets tough and I've been on a seven week traveling spell, so  much for balance.

I'm needed to bring income to  my family and therefore, it takes me away from them.  You know that's what Jesus asked of the disciples.  He asked them to leave everything and follow Him.  We may not like to hear it's His life, not ours but in truth, that's exactly what it is.  This life goes far beyond what we want to do and really lies in what He is asking us to do for Him.

As I look at the turmoil in government and see the stubborn politicians and leaders, I realize two things, we want what we want and we really don't care what's best for the nation or this world.  Men control the direction of peoples lives and a prideful spirit, lack of wisdom and absolutely no common sense is what's leading the world not living for Jesus.  The only thing Jesus asked any of us was to be humble, to watch for Him and to follow when called.  That's it.  Today, we want people to bend to our agendas, to agree in senseless wars and to forsake wisdom for destruction.  That's where we are but maybe if we sat down for a minute and prayed, a shift would happen and many would come to be wise.

I'm not hopeful that we will all get there but I know that Jesus is in control and that He is calling disciples to carry the message around the world.  I know that He detests pride and loves wisdom and I know that when we seek, we will find Him.  He can run the world far better than we can.  We just don't let Him.

I hope today finds you well my sisters and that you are looking at the beauty around you.  It's great to know we have purpose, that we've been called to a greater adventure than what lies here on earth and that our Lord waits, loves and guides us toward Him.  We have a great power in prayer and the death of Jesus.  His resurrection means we have eternal life and that one day we will see Him in all His glory.  I know from experience that I don't deserve Him but yet, He loves me anyway. 

I thought this was fitting considering where I am right now. Pray for your leaders, for your country and for the world.  Prayer and Jesus go hand in hand. He hears us, cry out!

Psalm 46:1-2 NIV

     God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.  Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.

Until tomorrow....