Well it's a new day today and as I let my dogs out this morning, I actually encountered 60 degree temperatures. Considering just a few weeks ago we were in the 111's, I will take every morning like this one. All we need now is a couple days of rain and everything will be good in my world. Do you ever stop to wonder what makes a day good for you? What little thing in your day made you smile? I do. Jesus makes me smile, my family makes me smile and obviously 60 degree temperatures make me smile. Everyone has something that makes them smile, even when they feel like they have nothing to smile about.
This past week I've been talking to my girlfriend who continues to lose her hair, she will be going to Mayo clinic in a few weeks, which is funny because the appointment was set in February and she still hasn't found healing. There's not much to make her smile these days. She finds hope in a new doctor and they get stumped. The darn ringworm will just not go away. Her closest friends have been replaced by new ones, her husband has stuck by her like a trooper but often, she tells me she has nothing to smile about. It's hard to watch a joyous person lose what I think is essential to life. She tries, believe me, but things just keep getting more difficult and she just would like healing. I get that. But this is where God is so good, she is a mother of six children. So even when she wants to feel sorry for herself, she can't. But that's not what's funny. Her youngest is a pistol. I think she's probably become more of one since this trial began. I find her hysterical, probably because she's not mine, but nevertheless, she lightens the load with her stubbornness, her sense of I need you right now and her overall comedic relief. Whenever I hear my friends voice sound down, I ask her what Caris is doing? Right away, I can hear the smile in her voice. She makes us all laugh and reminds us to get out of ourselves and take care of the ones we were given. Nice, right? Well it is because this kid never wants to wear clothes, has to have her mom come in the bathroom with her, turn around and close her eyes. She is the essence of childhood and I love her for it.
I love to hear my friend laugh. It's hard when you aren't funny and she is truly a comedian. I just want to hear that smile and know that she's okay. Yesterday, she said, "Do you think I need to repent more?" I said to her, "Haven't you repented daily during this journey?" I already knew the answer, she had. I have walked with her since January and know every thought, every word and every prayer that woman has made to her maker. She has confessed her darkest thoughts, her greatest fears and her love for Christ. She hasn't really understood this trial but she has become much more familiar with, "I can't go another day without you Lord." We all think we know God so well, until you have a spiritual battle that knocks you to your knees. That's when you truly get to experience the power of Jesus Christ.
I've learned a lot in this journey too. I've learned not to guess what God's going to do next. I've learned to listen to her and verify her feelings. I've learned that this is a Spiritual battle and I'm the prayer warrior called. And at the end of every day, I've learned and so has she that only Jesus can fix her. That's powerful! I keep coming back to what God wants us to really focus on. What's he asking of my friend and I over the last 8 months and the only conclusion I have is that we must love Him. I must constantly remind her that His death was our reward. I must remind myself that He is the power and that although He uses me to minister to her, His glory will be done. I know that in my life, the only thing that has powered me through the darkness is loving Him. We all fall down, it's how we get back up that matters. If we do it in our own strength, we fail but when we seek Him and love Him with all our hearts, He will be there and we will see His hand.
If you know of someone that is going through a hard time, don't try to fix them. Get on your knees and pray for them and when they call, answer your phone. They don't need to hear you say that they need to be happy or how long are you going to be depressed. Just listen to them and pray for them. They will reveal their weaknesses to you, just pray. And if they are holding something too tight, ask them to hold Jesus instead. God is a jealous God. We must not hold our fists tight. We have to open them and say to Him, You're enough. Don't lose hope if things don't change right away, God has a plan and your a part of it.
Mark 12:30 NKJV:
And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength." This is the first commandment.
My prayer today:
O, Lord, I come before You and beg of You to read my heart. If there is sin, please reveal it so that I can repent. I want to be Your woman full of You. At the end of every day I want to open my hands and say, "You're enough." And when I wake, I want You to be the first thing I think about. You have been my light in the darkness and I strive to know You more. Help women, all over the world, to see Your hand in their trials and remind them of Your love for them. We were chosen for a reason and our lives are Yours. Grow women that will stand by their friends in their hour of need. Give us the courage to be bold and to speak of You wherever we are. Guide us to You, every moment, every second we breathe. We need You Lord, not just in trials, but always. You are our peace, our protector and our friend. Help us to seek You daily and to put You first in our lives. Every step needs to be toward You and away from our fears, our worries and our doubts. Lead us by still waters and grant us Your presence today! You are mighty Lord, we bow down before You and thank You for making us Yours. In Jesus name, AMEN
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