Good morning all-
Sorry I haven't written much this week, I was in Houston at a conference and worked from morning until late in the evening. Actually, that's where God stepped in this week. I have really been struggling for the last month. Much is changing in my life. In three months my oldest will be married and my youngest has been talking about going into the military. It's hard enough to lose them but the military scares me to death. I have always prayed for soldiers and I am so appreciative for what they do for this country but in the back of my mind I hoped my children never picked that route. Why you might ask? Because I'm terrified of losing them. Strange, I know, coming from a woman who loves God so much but there it is out in the open for all to see.
My children have been my very world. They have given me so much and I have been so blessed to be their mom. I thank God every day for them. For every spill, every tantrum, every episode of talking back and for every piece of laundry dropped right before the laundry basket, I feel blessed. That's the truth. They are my joy. And now, I must give them back to the Lord. Do you know hard that is for me? I have lost three of the people I love the most and each time I sent them to my Lord, praising Him. But what if my son's choice to be in the military sends him there too? It's a question that has tormented me, brought me great anxiety and fear. So for over a month, as my son has continued to say, "The few, the proud, the Marines," I have prayed. I just wasn't praying the right things until I met a beautiful woman named Sherri yesterday.
You know how you meet someone and instantly want to be their friend. That's what happened to me yesterday. I met this lady in the bathroom at our conference and we were laughing at how cold it was and how I needed to use the restroom because it was so cold. She introduced herself and we went back into the conference. I left the hotel, dropped off another friend who I love dearly and went into my terminal. Who should be behind me? Sherri. So I asked her if she wanted to go to lunch. I never get to do that. As a matter of fact, I'm either with clients or by myself. This is where God stepped in.
He knows our thoughts and fears. He is with us and when we seek Him, He will answer. Well, my encouragement came from Sherri yesterday and I will forever be grateful and I hope this is the beginning of a friendship. We began our conversation like every stranger,"What do you do?, "Do you have children?" You know the drill. And then she told me about her oldest and guess what? He's a Marine. No one knows you better then God, never forget that. I asked her many questions, including, "Aren't you scared?" Her answer was, "We only have them for a little while and then we have to give them back to God." You can imagine what was going on in my head. How many times have I said that to myself? Without knowing it, she had just made me face that my son was probably going into the service. Sherri is a very wise and Godly woman, so I hope she is reading this now and as a side note, I will help you and your daughter-in-law start a blog. Her insight and her prayer life for herself and her son spoke to my heart. I don't want to hold Hunter back from his plan, his purpose and his God. I want him to be a man after God's own heart. So for over two hours we bonded and we laughed and I felt calmer, more secure and more aware that God stepped in with this wonderful woman and made me see that I must give up my fear, have courage and give my son to Him. He is not mine, he is His!
I wasn't in the house 20 minutes when my 6'8" giant came upstairs, touching my arm and palming my head. He loves to do that, I think he believes its a basketball. Anyway, he was needing help in the kitchen when he said, "You know mom they take your phones away and strip you of everything in basic," My answer, "I know that and you can write and receive letters on occasion." I normally would have instantly been in fear. Instead, I felt peace. Why? Because I have come to the conclusion that I can not stop the journey God is placing him on. It is his journey and his time. I must be supportive and proud and if he chooses to go into service I have to believe this is God's plan. And like I have done for over thirty years, I will pray Psalm 91 over him, as I have done for my best friend in the army. He has led men on many tours and I have always prayed it for him and the men that served him. I can't go in fear anymore. I must see yesterday as a sign to let God lead Hunter as Mary did for Jesus. Mary would never have stopped Jesus from fulfilling His promise. She encouraged Him, followed Him and watched her son die on the cross. She put her trust in God and I'm sure she prayed for courage, peace and understanding.
So I will do the same. I give Hunter to you Jesus, He is yours. May his life be for your glory! Thank you Sherri for being God's messenger.
If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. (Romans 14:8 NIV)