As I write, I can hear the birds out front signing as loud as they can. I've taken my shower and am half way ready to be at church this morning. I woke up with thanksgiving in my heart for a God who is constant and I began in prayer, wondering what the future holds and not really caring about the direction as long as Christ was directing it.
This is not a normal place for me. For over a year, I grumbled, had trouble getting out of bed, was misunderstood, lied about and in some ways humiliated. I woke not wanting to leave the comfort of my cave and yet knowing I would. It was a miserable existence for someone who loves to love, feel the sunlight on her face and who wants to stay positive for herself and others. Instead, I let pride and depression become my compass and with that dread, conflict, confusion and despair became my friends and in no way were they my friends.
That's when I grabbed the rope. And it wasn't just a little tie my lumber down in the back of my truck rope. It was a Godly inspired rope. It was made of steal, wrapped in titanium and flashed like lightning. It was from heaven and it was my saving grace. I really didn't picture this until a sermon last week and I thought to myself, "I grabbed the rope with Christ and tugged and tugged and He never once let go." My rope had many facets including crying out to the Holy Spirit for direction, reading my Bible, digging into Scripture daily, making images of it and praying it out loud. And of course, I confessed my sins, repented for things I didn't even know existed and asked God to put my feet on solid ground, which by the way it wasn't.
Many would probably think I was weak and I guess in some ways I was. I was being stretched to my limit. I was being molded, shaped, crushed and re-made. I felt like putty going in every direction and hoping that when I was stretched to my limit I didn't break. That's where I was and that's what I remember now as I'm being stretched again. As I wonder what God is doing in my life, I have a choice. I can trust that God has gone before me or I can panic and flounder like a fish out of the sea. I get to choose. I get to either stand still, realize God has my back or I can control what I don't know and worry, fear and quake.
Being stretched was hard but the blessing on the back end was worth it. I imagine that's how Job felt. I'm sure when he was going through illness, distress, failure of earthly support and loss of home, possessions and children, he felt stretched to his limit and yet, as he prayed and grumbled God came to him and restored him for his faithfulness.
My desire is always to be faithful. Am I? No. I'm just like you. I quake and when I do I have a Savior waiting to straighten me, direct me and set me on solid ground. Jesus helped me and He will help you too.
I leave you this morning with this question on my heart. Who saves us when we are stretched to our limit? Only Jesus can!
Psalm 40:2 NIV
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.
Ask this and watch Jesus work and answer you!
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